How to be a life coach with a good temperment

Do You Have the Right Temperament to be a Life Coach?

You need to have the right temperament to be a life coach. For most people, temperament isn’t something they can simply learn. It is an ability they need to be able to bring to the table on their own to be successful. However, don’t be discouraged if you think you might not have it. There are many tools to develop it before going into the business.

Here’s what you need to know

So what kind of temperament are we talking about here? For starters, you need to be able to sell yourself like a good quality salesperson. I am not saying you have to be deceptive or slick. I just mean you need to express yourself in a positive and enthusiastic way. Selling is not something a coach typically wants to do. After all, you want to help people not sell people. But, you are running a business and clients aren’t just going to come knocking at your door. But if they do, you need the confidence to keep them there.

If you are a highly introverted person who hates talking to others, then you’re going to have a very short career as a life coach. Sure, you may be able to sell books without talking to people, but that’s not where the heart of life coaching is.

Real life coaches spend time talking to people and guiding them in their life’s journey. If talking and spending time with people is not something you like to do, then you either need to figure out how to change that or give up on life coaching altogether.

If you still want to be a life coach the good news is…

If you’re serious about wanting to be a life coach, then perhaps you are an introvert who desperately would like to be an extrovert. In this case, you just have to develop your interpersonal skills.

A good way to practice your coaching skills while being seen by others is to create a YouTube channel where you give free advice to people on video.

The videos you record can serve two purposes:

Recording videos will give you practice talking about your experiences and the methods you’ve developed that can help people change their lives. Even though you won’t physically be in front of individuals, it’s still good practice for conveying your thoughts through speech.

Posting videos on the internet allow you to advertise your life coaching services for free. If you post to YouTube, you can embed the video and post it on Facebook, Twitter, and other social media networks for free.

Creating videos on your YouTube channel lets you get comfortable in front of people in an indirect way. While you create your videos, you will notice that you create a persona that becomes more comfortable speaking out loud in public.

Another way to build your extrovert muscles is to work on your coaching through a series of exercises or assignments that you might get in a life coach training. Often when you are just trying out techniques, you can relax because you know it is just practice. If you do that enough, you will gradually roll into a more comfortable state when working with clients. Our Life Coach Track includes around sixty assignments to give you lots of practice!

How are you on listening?

If you want to be a life coach in addition to being a good talker, you also have to be a good listener. Remember, life coaching is similar to mental health counseling. And what do counselors do the most? They listen!

When people go to a life coach, they are trying to seek advice from them about how to fix a problem in their lives. But first, they have to tell the life coach about their problem.

If you are going to be effective in treating your client’s problem, you have to take in everything they are saying and then develop solutions to their problem in your mind. A great tool for being a good listener is asking questions. It forces you to listen to find more things to ask. It is important to ask more questions, so you don’t jump to conclusions (which people who aren’t good listeners tend to do). The NLP Meta Model is a perfect tool to help develop this skill.

Don’t fall into the trap of just giving your clients the same exact advice. Many bogus gurus and life coaches will memorize a script and then say the same thing to everyone. Reciting the same solution will not be sufficient for each person’s problem, and it certainly won’t make you a good life coach either. And, the client will probably not return, which is not good for business either.

A good life coach is one who is compassionate and can be encouraging to their clients. Sometimes people just need a little encouragement to make a positive change in their life.

Think about the usual problems that a person has. Perhaps they have low self-confidence, can’t lose weight, can’t start a business, or can’t get a girlfriend. These are problems that everyone knows how to fix on their own. They just need someone to motivate them to do it. Otherwise, they’ll just keep going back and forth in their heads about whether or not they should take action. As a life coach, you are the one who gives them “permission” to take action.

Keep your baggage to yourself

To be a life coach, you’ll have to mentally prepare yourself not to let your personal life interfere with your life coaching. This is a lesson that a mental health counselor knows all too well.

If you are having a bad day and then you carry that anxiety into a coaching session with your client, it is not going to do them any good seeing you miserable and unhappy. Your client is the one who is supposed to be miserable and unhappy. You are the life coach who is expected to be happy and upbeat about life. If you end up looking as sad as your clients do, they are going to wonder why they’re even doing talking to you.

As a friend, it is easy to share your personal experiences when you are casually talking to someone. But, if you want to be a life coach, you can’t be so casual, especially if your experiences cause you to commiserate with your client. Empathy and sympathy are essential, but ripping on men because your client’s ex-husband is a jerk is definitely not appropriate.

Therefore, keep your personal baggage out of the office and away from your clients. You must be professional at all times just like a mental health counselor would.

So how do I do that?

Most people who either want to become a really good life coach find it’s essential for them to deal with their issues first. Spending the time investing in your self-development is part of the process in a quality Life Coach Training. iNLP Center covers self-improvement topics that will address your personal issues as well as teaching you how to help your clients address theirs. Throughout the iNLP Center Life Coach Track, you will be practicing all the techniques and tools on yourself and with others. Practicing the models on yourself first will give you better insight into what your client may be thinking or feeling when you use the tools with them. This aspect is an essential part of any training. When you have worked on your problems and consistently address your issues using tools that work, you’ll be able to help others much more efficiently. You will then have the power to be a life coach with an excellent temperament!

Hope Bundrant
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